Do you reverence your husband?

Whuuuuuuuuuuuhhh?  I know, I did the same thing… or maybe you’re a bit smarter than I and already knew what that meant. 

Reverence is the act of showing respect…a mingling of fear with a high degree of respect and esteem.

So back in my helpmeet book… she talks about a woman who was in a horrible situation with an abusive, unfaithful, alcoholic husband.  When he would always come home in his drunken rages, she would leave and run to her mothers and threaten to leave and call all her friends and tell them what a loser he was.   But she’d never leave.  Finally one day, Mrs Pearl ran into her at church in a tearful mess and she told her of her plot to murder her husband.  Long story short, Debi told her once and for all she needed to make a decision, either to leave her husband and put the pieces of her life back together or stay with him and begin a campaign of winning his heart and saving their life together.  Debi TOTALLY thought she would leave that night.  But she didn’t.  She did just the opposite.  Debbie counseled her to only speak to her husband in an encouraging uplifting manner and to only speak OF him with her friends in the same manner.  This woman had a learners heart and had ‘grasped an eternal vision about life and believed God could save her marriage.’  The change in her husband was almost immediate.  Within a week she saw change.  He stopped going off with his drunken friends and got a job to help support the family.  Today they are growing their relationship with Christ together. 

 

Yes our husbands lead our home. It’s natural. It’s the way God designed it.  But we, as helpmeets, play THE biggest role in our husbands being enabled to be that amazing leader.  They will be what we think of them and tell them.  Put it to the test.  If you’ve been a bit nagging and negative lately, flip it.  Last time I checked, nagging and negative got me nowhere.  Try praising the things he has accomplished…. The smallest things… make a big deal about them.  Then… tell him what a great father and leader of the home he is… but you first need to pray and believe it in your heart.  If you don’t believe it first, he won’t.  You’ll see a change in him.  I promise. 

Trent and I learned this with Noah as well… instead of only speaking when he’s done wrong, we make it a point to tell him when he’s done well.  Even if it’s just ‘Noah, you did so well tonight, you were polite, and quiet’  and we love on him and encourage him.  He likes the attention so he’ll want to do that again. 

And ladies… for the love of all that is good and holy… stop going to work and having the huddles where everyone is talking negatively about their men.  What good is it doing?  None.  You will subconsciously carry that home and have that same negative attitude at home and make it a place where he doesn’t’ want to be.  Start a revolution.  Go to work and brag about what your husband does, yes at first, shock will overcome them all… but I promise, it will catch on.  And if you find yourself in a husband bashing conversation, turn it around.  Be like, ‘oh really?  I’m sorry, but listen to what my man did… and lift him up.’   One of two things will happen.  You’ll either become an encouragement to those women to do the same, or they’ll stop having the man bashing conversations around you.  Either way… You win!  I promise your marriage will thank you.

Stop and think… make a list of the negative things you’ve said to your husband today… now next to it make a list of the negative things you’ve said to others about your husband today… NOW…. Make a list of nice things about your husband and go home and tell him.  Then tell others... create an email to all your friends bragging about your husband.  We CAN make a difference in our husbands… God will smile on you.  “…and the wife see that she reverence her husband” Eph 5:33

Move it Gramps!

Welp.  I’m officially a mall walker.  Yep.  And I’m not even a senior citizen yet.  I’m an over achiever!  Ladonna and I were talking about what we were going to do when it starts getting really hot outside… we already come in smelling like kids on recess… after walking in the Oklahoma wind for 45 minutes… so we talked about getting a membership at OSU OKC up the road and then a friend of ours piped in and said ‘why don’t you just go to Shepherd Mall and walk for FREE!’  uh.  Hello?  ABSOLUTELY!  I’m all about some Free!  So we tried it out today.  We could lap the Cox compound in 15 minutes…we can lap the Shepherd Mall in 7 minutes and that’s even dodging grams and gramps!  Downside:  They have about 3 restaurants’ in there to accommodate Farmer’s Insurance and the school… so we get to smell fresh baked bread from Subway and hamburgers and burrito’s from Dizzy’s and I think it’s asian food from another little joint in there… But we don’t battle wind or weather.  So.

 

I’ll weigh in on Monday and let you know how the small battles are paying off.  Regardless of what the scale says.. I feel better, with the exception of the blisters ALL OVER my footsies…  I’ve just ordered something off the internet called Tuf Foot.  And yes, it was designed for dogs and Horses…for the cost, I better be able to run like Jackie Joyner Kersey… or however you spell her name…We’ll see.  If I start barking or hiking a leg… I’ll let you know.

“Is Trent leaving the Edmond Campus?” GASP!

Many people have inquired, so let me set this straight to the 3 people that read my blog and you can tell people you heard it straight from his wife’s mouth.  Trent has NO intentions of leaving Lifechurch Edmond Campus.  Yes, they are changing the style of worship to try and engage and lead the church in a more active style of worship.  Bryan Witham is the Youth Worship Leader and Trent believes in him whole heartedly.  Marcy Jackson has stood by Trent’s side for years now and together they all three bring an energy to the room that is impossible to deny.  Trent has never been a man who wanted to be stage center and will testify to this day that he is only there because that’s where God wants him.  He still can’t believe he gets to lead worship for a living… it is his passion. 

 

Now… as his wife, I’ll tell you the reason people are drawn to his worship is because it IS his passion.  He has no other desire when he’s on that stage than to worship his God and lead the people to do the same.  The first thing I remember about Trent when I first saw him was that I truly saw Jesus in his eyes.  He loves his Lord and believes every word he sings with all that he is.  It’s never about how great he sings, or how talented he is… every bit of what he does is all for one purpose… to see God’s smile.  When someone resonates a love for Christ that passionately, you can’t help but want what he has.  THAT is why people drive from all over to be led to a place of worship by him.

I myself did not know what it meant to “worship” when I first became a believer, which is the majority of what Lifechurch.tv is… a church of new believers.  I attended that church for two years before I met Trent.  When I first came to Lifechurch, the music really appealed to me and before that I was never a Christian Music type of girl.  So the combination of Craig Groeshel’s style of applying biblical truths to today’s world mixed with Trent’s worship, I was sold.  There was no turning back.  I WANTED to know the words to these songs so that I could sing them from my heart.  I was blessed enough to meet and become friends with Cindy Beall (who at the time was the campus pastor’s wife – we both had 6-year-old Noah’s) and so sitting with her (who she herself used to lead worship with her husband) I loved her freedom in worshiping her God.  I learned that Worship is not just raising your hands in the air and singing.  It’s coming to a place spiritually that it doesn’t matter if 1500 other people are in the room or 1 other person, because all your aware of is your God’s presence… and you are so overcome by Him, that it may bring you to your knees… peel a huge smile across your face… draw both hands in the air… spin you around in circles or whatever you feel at that time.  It’s a form of self expression to your God.  I’ve danced with him… I’ve raised my hands to him… I’ve dropped to my knees for him and it’s all done without thought, without hesitation.  It’s the passion stirring inside that you just can’t deny.  It brings you to a place of such joy, such freedom.  I look forward to getting to worship every weekend and yes, I am very blessed that it is my husband that leads me there. 

It’s not about the lights, it’s not about the music, it’s not about the smoke… it’s about the voices.  I’ve always said, I LOVE LOVE LOVE and LOVE it when the music stops or drops so low and all I hear are the people singing.  It’s elating.  Gives me goosebumps everytime… and I know with all that I am, God is smiling.

So rest assured Trent’s not going anywhere.  This weekend, realign, and worship like a child…dance… laugh… love… as though He’s standing right beside you… because He is.  J

 

things that cross my mind while peeing

The one that jumped out at me today was squished toilet paper.  You know what I mean, the dangling piece from the user before you that grabbed the delicate tissue in both hands and pulled it apard as if it were a wishbone… therefore, on the dangling part, leaving wrinkled, squished toilet paper.  So then my mind goes to I don’t want paper that person has touched on my delicate private parts.  Who knows if they were in there picking their nose, or even if they are a hand washer in general.  Kinda grossed myself out in thought.  So I then carefully pulled to gain excess as to cover the squished part generously. 

There have been times that I will tear the squished off and dispose, but then I feel guilty that maybe that piece of toilet paper would be sad because it didn’t get to serve it’s purpose in life.  What if in the toilet paper world they work their whole life to get to that point, and then they are disposed of without use.  That would make me sad.  All the other toilet papers would talk about you and point and laugh and snicker.  Your toilet paper parents would be disappointed.  You get the point. 

Update on the battles… I am still winning the small battles, have been for three days now and have the blisters on my feet to prove it.  If any of you are in doubt, feel free to request to see these blisters, they are doozies.  If you see me walking with a limp this weekend, you know why.  I will pray against all blisters for any of you. 

Don’t kick a skunk

Doesn’t that rank right up there with…

• Don’t chew on tin foil
• Don’t hammer a small wood shard between your finger and finger nail
• Don’t punch an infant in the face
• Don’t drive directly off a cliff
• Don’t tell a biker his vest is very pretty but would look better bedazzled
• Don’t stand on tacks
• Don’t lick fire
• Don’t attempt a back flip for the first time at 40 with no professional training
• Don’t kiss a snake you found in your back yard
• Don’t play with black widow’s (oh wait, I did allow my son to do that – whole nuther blog)

These are all the unspoken.  I could go on and on with these… yet someone felt it necessary to post this on one of those signs on the side of the road where you can say anything you want to as long as you have a long suction cup stick to get your plastic letters up there… you know what I’m talking about CeeKayBee.  We pass it every day going home.  What is the logic behind it?  Why when you have an opportunity to say what ever you want, to so many daily captured audience drivers of that road, do you choose to say, don’t kick a skunk?

I think I’m going to get one for my front yard, but I’m going a step beyond and I’m going to get one that has the flashing yellow lights that form an arrow and start forcing my useless advice on everyone as well.  At least in the blogging world you all CHOOSE to come here.  I HAVE to drive by that advice everyday.  Why?  Why, Lord? 

What if I did a late night mission in all black <enter Mission Impossible theme here> and rearranged the letters…

NO STANK DUCK or I CANT DUNK KKKS 

This is all just as use full to me as ‘don’t kick a skunk’.

I’m sorry, this post was useless, but it bugs me and therefore should bug all of  you as well.

Any unspoken that you’d like to share?

Today’s Battle

First and foremost, everyone immediately stop reading…now wait, if that truly happened you wouldn’t know what I was saying right now… so odd’s are you’re still reading… what I was trying to get at, is immediately go to Marcy Priest and check out her new album.  

Yes I love my husband and Yes he produced it, but that is NOT why I’m sending you there… this girl is AMAZING!  Seriously.  Now.  Go.  Then come back and read.  You’re still reading aren’t you.  You don’t listen well.  NOW.  Go.  I’ll still be here when you get back. 

Craig Groeschel (my senior pastor) spoke a couple of weeks ago about winning today’s battle in his Warrior Series  It REALLY hit home with me.  I haven’t been able to get it out of my head.  For those of you who don’t know me, I’m fat.  Not a big girl… not chubby… not big boned… I’m a tub o’ lard! 

Trent laughs every time I say that...  which here lately is quite often. 

I haven’t been this big since high school and NO, it’s not because I’m unhappy.  It’s quite the opposite, I’d say.  I’m fat and happy.  That’s what I always tell my husband.  He loves me regardless and I did marry him because he’s a fat squisher (he loves to hold my fat rolls).  Seriously… I know a few of you just threw up a little in your mouths, but it’s true.  I love him.

So, my biggest battle in life has always been my weight.  It fluctuates.  Mostly up.  But there have been years when I had a six pack and wore little shirts that showed off my navel ring.  These day’s I can’t even find my belly button.  I’ve just gotten lazy and found happiness in my husband and my life.  I quit focusing on myself.  Good?  Yes.  Good?  No.  Good in the fact that it’s not about me, bad in the fact that it needs to be a little about me. 

There are two main reasons why I want to lose weight. 

One:  I have a history of hormonal cancer in my family and I know illness thrives on unhealthy. 

Two:  I want to be as attractive to my husband as I possibly can be.  I want him to always look at me and be thankful he married me.  Now, Trent is not vain at all… but men enjoy their wives to look nice.  I understand that. 

Today’s battle… so Craig was talking about instead of fighting the big battle that seems overwhelming… fight today’s battle.  That made so much sense for me because I’d set these 3 month goals or even a month goal of eating well and exercising blah blah blah and a week would come and go and I’d cheat and be right back where I was… on the ground, staring up at the wagon driving away.   So when I pray now, I pray for God to give me strength for today’s battle.  Just today’s battle.  When I’m hungry and I’m thinking about a taco or burger, I say to myself, fight this little battle… meaning (go back to work and pop open a can of soup).  And when I do, I’m victorious.  I just won that battle.  And then when I want a coke… I say to myself, fight this little battle… and I get water.  Again.  Winner!  We own a treadmill… I want to get up in the morning and walk, but for the love of all that is good and holy I just can’t…and there is NO time in the evenings between, dinner, laundry, kids, lifegroup, plans, etc… so today, I strapped on my tennis shoes and a friend and I went walking at lunch around the parking lot for 45 minutes.  Again, we had plans tonight (for a dinner date, none the less) at 6:30 so I won’t have time to walk when I get home… so I thought to myself, how do I fight this battle…and now I’m sitting her typing to you, a successful warrior princess for the day!  It’s so elating to me to win these little battles.  

Are you seeing the big picture yet?  I’m not taking on the whole battle.  I can’t win that one.  I’m taking on the small battles day by day and ONLY with God’s help.  And by winning those small battles day by day, the big one will be victorious. 

Thanks Craig. 

thank you

My friend commented me today to say thank you.  I don’t know why I find that funny, it is me that should be thanking her… her email caused me to crack the bindings on The Good Book for the first time in over a month and I spent all morning in it.  Felt good.  Thank you, Jen. 

 What’s the longest time you’ve gone that you can remember without being in The Word?

transparent

Let me be real transparent here on why I haven’t been blogging.  Besides the fact that I’ve been crazy busy with kids on Spring Break and creating worship videos…My blog started out sharing biblical truths and turned into a journal of sorts.  I love sharing my life and days but I want it to have some meaning as well.  In the move, I misplaced my Created to be His Help Meet book.  Welp… I’ve found it.  I’ll be blogging on that soon.

A good friend of mine emailed me today, crying out for help.  Talk about transparency.  She spent the morning reading Cindy Beall, Mandy, Natalie, Shanna Crawford and my blogs and wants what we all have, JESUS!  This is a quote directly from her.  It was after I read her email, that I thought to myself… it’s so funny how God uses people to reach other people… people they don’t even know they are reaching… and he uses people no matter where they are, in their walk with Him.  I wanted to tell her I haven’t cracked open my bible for a month now.  I still have regular talks with Him but how can I truly get to know Him better and witness if I don’t read and study the Truth.  I worship with him every weekend, but I haven’ t sought Him out in over a month.  I thank him every morning on the way to work for the beautiful things he creates in my every day and ask of his protection over my family yet I won’t take 10 minutes of my beautifully created day to seek Him out.  I want to know Him better.  I want to know His stories.  It was my happiest times… and I’m ready to make the time again.  I miss it.  But all that wasn’t what she wanted to hear.  

I’m spiraling down hill fast into the depths beyond my own knowledge.  Am I scared?  Yes.  Am I scared?  No.  My eyes are open.  I’m watching my life pass me by.  My conscious is vigilant, but it’s as though I’m lost in a comatose state and lack the ability to counter.  That’s the scary part, when will I wake up?  When will I take charge of my own forthcomings?  When is it my time?  When do I say enough?  That’s the part I’m ready for.  The change.  The time where I can sit back in my life and say, this is where I want to be.  I’m not an ignorant person.  Is love that strong that it can influence every aspect of my life?  It manipulates my manner in which I relate to my only son.  It rules my checkbook.  It wakes me up in the morning and tells me everyday, this is going to be a good day, or sorry, not today.  It holds a day long to the very last minute to arrange time for those that have requested time with great notice.  It never lets go until you feel like there is nothing left of you.

My friend didn’t write this.  I did.  I wrote the above passage in my journal about 3 years ago.  I was in the lowest state of my life.  I knew I was there, and I knew something had to change.  It wasn’t long after that, I gave my life to Christ and let me tell you… I’m sitting back in my life right now looking around, saying ‘this is where I want to be.’  It took my writing it out and seeing that the only one who was going to change the direction my life was heading, was me.  It sounds simple… but it took me quite some time to get there.  When I made the decision, I MADE the decision.  All in.  I’m talking erasing phone numbers from my phone and if the phone rang and a name didn’t pop up, I didn’t answer it.  I would have disconnected the number had I not had a terminally ill mother who had that number on every emergency contact list.  I burned old photo’s of a girl I didn’t want to be anymore.  I turned off the TV.  I started filling up that time with Truth.  I got rid of everything I felt like was eroding my life right in front of my eyes, and that included people who didn’t understand.  I was ok with them not understanding…because…. I did.  I decided, I was going to live for me.  It was the best decision of my life.   

I say all this because I really feel like my friend is where I was…. or in the vicinity.  See, where I had never experienced His forgiveness and His grace, she already knows Christ.  She knows the freedom.  She’s just lost her way.  She’s angry.  Really angry, and hasn’t let go of that anger.  She lost the father of her children in an accident a couple of years ago and I’m not sure she’s ever really worked through it.  She lost it.  She turned to drugs… men… and anything that would take away the pain.  She rebeled against all she had known…all of this while trying to be a mother to two young children.  I believe she wants to change, she just doesn’t know how to get there… and I don’t know if I’m the person to get her there.  I know God brought me into her life, and for that I’ll be forever thankful… I wonder… did he bring me into her life to walk beside her and be her friend along her journey… or to take her by the hand and lead her there.  I guess time will only tell.  Pray for my friend.  Only God can fulfill her and make her love herself as much as He does and He can only do that if she allows Him.  Irony… at it’s finest.  Love is a choice.  Right now, she’s choosing not to love herself.  When she see’s the way Christ loves her, and accepts His love again, it will seep from her own pores.  A glowing countenance.  If you’re reading this.  I love you.  I’m here for you.  Always.        

How Babies Are Made… By Noah Nguyen

 After a day of Noah and Goodness (Tess… our 9 year old) bugging Trent and I about having a baby…. we were walking out of Ted’s and Noah was at it again about having a baby… so I turned to him and said, ‘Noah, do you know where babies come from?’ thinking that would put an end to the conversation… oh no… he said ‘yeah, your tummy’  I said, ‘ok, but do you know how they get in my tummy?’  He said, ‘No… don’t you just eat bones and that’s what make the babies bones?’  I said yes, and was done with it.  :)  I realize soon, we’ll have to have a talk with him concerning this subject before he hears it on the bus, but for now, I’m content with him thinking I just swallow bones.  I’ve even thought about acting like I was eating a bone, and telling him I’m trying to get pregnant, just to mess with  him a bit.  I know.  I’m wrong.  

Here I Am To Worship…

 

Got off the Treadmill tonight and walked into bears room to check on him… he was in bed, with the lights off, his clothes set out, I thought he was asleep.  As I got closer to give him a kiss, I noticed his earphones… he was listening to his MP3 player.  He handed me one and we sang Here I Am To Worship and Grace Like Rain together.  It’s a great feeling to know he’s going to bed listening to Here I am To Worship rather than something like Bringin Sexy Back by Timberlake.  I know that seems funny to most of you, but I was not afforded that type of childhood.  Although an amazing childhood with AMAZING parents… my childhood definetely lacked a relationship with my creator.  Noah has a foundation at age 8 that I didn’t have until 30.  I’ll rest well tonight knowing the last thing our son heard before drifting off was music created for his savior.