Thankfulness is a result of being content with God’s will

Ok, this is the last post on Part 1 of this book (The Help Meet).  I realize most of you don’t like to read the long posts… So I’ll try to throw in some shorter ones.. but not today.  Ha!

The very heart of reverence is extreme appreciation and profound thankfulness that this man, just as he is, has chosen to love me, just as I am.

I sat in that for a few minutes.  She used the word ‘extreme’ (intense… excessive… severe) appreciation.  Not minor… trivial… or inconsequential.  Are you TRULY thankful that you’re husband chose to love you?  That he picked you out of aaaaaaaalllllllll the other women in this world to stand beside for the rest of his life?  I am.  I don’t deserve my husband and I say that with complete confidence and no reservations. I simply don’t deserve him.  But God has blessed me with him.  And it is no exaggeration that I thank God on a daily basis for him.  When is the last time you audibly said, ‘God… thank you for my husband’?  Honestly.  I know I never did with my first husband.  Now, I did not have a personal relationship with Christ then, and maturity and wisdom has changed my mindset 100 fold. 

I believe that Trent and I truly are thankful for each other.  Not the ‘oh yeah, he’s great’ or ‘yeah I could’ve done worse’ but truly thankful.  I’ll be the first to tell you I’m no prize, I’m overweight, moody and have my own quirks… but Trent was in shock that I would be interested in ‘a guy like him.’  I know a lot of you giggled just now but it’s true, he really said that.  And he thinks I’m a catch (still not exactly sure why)… therefore he’s thankful for me.  And I KNOW there were women everywhere that would have loved to been Mrs Trent Austin… and he chose me.  I’m still in shock and we’ve been married over 2 years now.  We are giddy in love because neither one of us have the mindset that ‘he/she is lucky to have me.’  We both feel very undeserving of the other but yet receive God’s gift and appreciate it every day. 

When you stop appreciating what God has given you, you lose the joy. 

I know a lot of you are thinking, yeah keri, that’s great, if my husband was like Trent our marriage would be great too.  I am here to tell you that Trent has flaws.  He’s human.  You all see Trent on stage every weekend… and at home, he IS the same man you see on stage… I am a very blessed woman.  He has a passion for Christ like no other I’ve seen… and it is inspiring.  But don’t think our marriage is all butterflies and rainbows.  The only thing I can tell you is that I enable him to lead our home, I don’t emasculate him, I don’t speak negatively of him to anyone or even myself… he tells me everyday how beautiful I am, weather I’m straight out of bed with crazy hair and cat litter breath or I’ve spent the last hour getting ready.  He encourages me and lifts me up.  He asks my opinion and seeks my advice.  We guard each other.  If our priorities are straight (#1 God, #2 Spouse) everything else just falls into place naturally.  We tell each other all the time, you’re my #2 and that’s where we want each other to be, because that means we are putting God first. 

The thing you have to get past is to not accentuate his flaws.  I have flaws.  You have flaws.  We all do.  If I spent my days telling my husband the things I didn’t like about him, he wouldn’t want to come home.  When you first meet someone and you’re sitting across the table from them you don’t say ‘your nose is big’ or ‘your teeth are crooked’  because you are so overwhelmed with this person and have so much innocent love and attraction for them that those slight flaws don’t matter.  In the beginning you spend all the time in the world making that person feel special and lifting them up and letting them know you think about them non stop.  Is there any better feeling in the world than falling in love?  Yes.  Having that same feeling 2 years down the road.  10 years down the road.  We were so willing to put all this effort into our relationship in the beginning… find that passion.  Don’t just assume that ‘we’ve been married 10 years, he knows I love him.’  Remind him.  You did then.  He knew you liked him a week into the relationship, but you still drove by and left a note on his car with his favorite candy bar while he was at work.    

Marriage is work.  Team work.  You both have to work… daily.  It’s the smallest things that make the biggest difference.  A man simply wants to know he’s respected and a woman simply wants to know she’s loved.  You show your man respect and he will show you love.  It’s truly that simple.